If I were to tell you all that’s gone on in our lives since we’ve been married I think your jaw would drop. Let’s see if it happens. . .
4 weeks after we got married, with the condition of the oil field, Gabe got laid off. That meant I moved to their apartment in Peachtree City before we had planned. Three of us & three cats lived in a two bedroom apartment. With the move to a new city for me my business slowed WAY down which equalled basically NO money coming in. I was nursing a hurt back which made normal life a bit uncomfortable much less working. Gabe got a job but worked long hours. Then he got a better job & threw his back out the second day in & had to step down. He got three different job offers with the oil field & every one fell through for some reason or another. I finally decided to get professional help with my back so I spent money there without it being completely fixed (but better for sure – I am experiencing less pain day by day). Then of course there’s the normal adjustment & learning each other when you move in together, so we worked through all those things too. Maybe small to you but my diet & exercise that I love kind of fell through the cracks so even that release was gone (totally my fault). Gabe has found a job he loves, works very long hard hours, & is very tired when we gets home. We finally found a house to rent, had to break the lease at the apartment, moved my things from Selma, the renters I had for my house fell through, and so this is where we are now. It’s been a CRAZY 10 months but. . .
through the changes, loneliness, tears, hard discussions, stress, and too tight pants it’s been beautiful! When Gabe & I dated (& even still now) we never really fought. Being one that does not like confrontation I told him that if I were to have to work through things with anyone it would be with him. That has proven true for sure. He is my safe place, he is my calm, he is patient, understanding, & so wise. He amazes me at every turn & I’m so blessed to have him in my life forever. These challenges have brought us together, changed us both, & are building a strong foundation for our life together.
I can’t say that I don’t stress about money or don’t feel lonely or out of place anymore. . . I do. Just yesterday I looked around at the mess in my office & the multitude of things to do ran like the Indie 500 through my mind. Gabe left the house with our Wildflower & I sat down amidst the boxes, camera gear, paper, canvases & almost let myself wallow in self pity. No, that won’t fix anything so I got going to make some space so I could think more clearly. Today, I woke to bills to be paid & still the mess but a new day. It’s a day, like every day, full of promise if we take a step forward. Our situation won’t change unless we do something about it. So, instead of worry & stress I’m placing my mind on goals & dreams & knowing that our situation will change when I move forward & if I think about it, things could be way worse. I’m excited for the plans running through my brain and all the good that lies ahead for us & our little family. I know that God is Good, He loves us, He’s never failed us, & He has big things in store for us.
All that to say, no matter what you’re going through you can see the beauty in it. God will always use the struggle for good. You may not know exactly what direction to go in but if you take a step forward & then another step you’ll begin to see where He’s leading you. Here’s to beautiful messes & journey well worth living.