2017 was a hard year for some people & I’ll put myself in that group. It wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle but it was just hard – emotionally, physically, spiritually, & financially. I found myself pouring through scripture at the beginning of the year & found a number of verses that seemed to give me hope for breakthrough. I washi taped those scriptures to my bathroom mirror & as I brushed my teeth & washed my face every day I’d read over them & believe them the best I could. “My God will meet all of our needs according to HIS riches in glory.” – Philippians 4:19 or “Whatever you decide to do will be accomplished, & light will shine on the road ahead of you.” – Job 22:28 I can’t say I always believed what I was reading but I’d pray them anyway. Honestly, I didn’t really see any answer to those prayers in 2017 except a little direction for business & to get pregnant but then we lost our first baby. What was going on? Was God even there? I felt distant & alone but I kept reading those scriptures even when I didn’t feel like it – it was all the hope I had to hold onto.
When 2018 came upon the scene I took down those little cards & wondered what this new year would hold for me, for us – my family. I began to think & pray about my word for 2018 & I felt like the Lord told me it was a year to be FIERCE. Fierce is having or displaying an intense or ferocious aggressiveness. I don’t see it as a bad ferociousness but as a boldness. I could no longer sit back & wait for things to be as I wanted them to be or pray weak prayers over my life & my family’s life. I was to be fierce in pursuit of God, fierce in my business, fierce in our finances, fierce as a wife & step mom, but most importantly fierce in being who God created me to be – strong & able, victorious spirit. It was then that the scriptures for the year began to fall into place. One came during a church service we attended on a whim, another at a service I attended with my sister, & some from a book I was reading. Some sounded pretty down & negative but with the ending being about trusting God & fiercely believing He is good & has good in store for me, for us. They felt like exactly where I’d been & where I was going so they got printed up and washi taped to the bathroom mirror again. My faith was built & my prayers became bolder. It was a new year & I was ready to believe the things God said about me.
To be honest with you, 2018 hasn’t been so great so far from the natural eye but with my spiritual eye God is doing good things in my life & my family’s lives. He’s showing me that the pressing in when we don’t feel like it & the pressing through when we want to give up & believing His Word does have great affect. He’s always working behind the scenes in His own timing. He just wants to know that we trust Him, that we’ll pursue Him at any cost, that we’ll be who we were created to be, that we’ll love the way He loves, that we’ll put emotion aside & do the things we need to do. Sometimes He’s the God of instant answers & sometimes He’s the God that wants to teach you something in the process of answering. He’ll give you little glimmers of hope along the way but always keep pressing through for the breakthrough. Oh, & when it feels like breakthrough is right there don’t stop, don’t stop until you see it in it’s fullness. It’s coming, just keep pressing in & pressing through.